Galen Burson – Married 10 years says, “ I come home and maybe assume that dinner’s gonna be ready…and if she hasn’t had time to it… to me I’m thinking you’re home all day, you could have planned this earlier…but… ya know.”

Does that sound familiar? Galen and Michelle burson have discovered what many couples learn… most marital conflicts stem from what might be called “differing assumptions.”

Dr. Phil Swihart – Marriage counselor, Focus on the Family says, “Often it’s not a matter of who’s right or wrong, it’s different – they had different assumptions… and so then that clashes.”

“I assume that I can kind of come home and take a load off, but she assumes that because she’s been there all day, that she can kind of shift gears and get some time to herself,” said Galen

Galen and Michelle’s assumptions weren’t necessarily wrong, they were just different. And when those unique perspectives collide, sparks can fly.

Dr. Swihart says, “People who think that marriage isn’t work are extremely naïve, it is very hard work… two imperfect human beings trying to come together… and they can’t articulate some of those differences very well.”

That’s why communication is so vital. Make sure your spouse doesn’t get caught off guard by your unspoken expectations.

Michelle Burson – Married 10 years says, “We’re not intending to wound one another, but I think it happens in marriage relationships so often just because of the level of intimacy that there is… communicating ahead of time, and knowing what speaks love to your partner, knowing… what would wound them… would prevent a lot of conflict.”

So consider taking a proactive approach… since unspoken expectations are sure to cause problems… keep the lines of communication open and nip those conflicts in the bud.