The day many new mothers can't wait for or they dread it.

Let's be honest, going back to work after maternity leave is sometimes a welcome change.  You've spent up to three months holed up in your home with a newborn, lucky to have changed out of your pajamas from day to day.  Taking a shower is a luxury.  The schedule pretty much revolves around eating, sleeping, diaper changes and spitups....the baby's not yours.

Going back to work means going back to some adult conversation and interaction.  A break from a human being who needs you constantly. 

But then again, it's a break from a human being who needs you constantly. 

Thanks to my news director I was able to change my schedule to work days instead of nights. That's why you won't see me on the 10:00 newscasts anymore.  The very capable Michelle Sherwood will be anchoring with Joe.  The schedule change means Joe gets to stay home with the kids in the mornings and I get to be home with them at nights.  They still go to daycare for 4 hours in the afternoons.

Handing our precious little bundle over to someone else was almost torture.  Jude had her first day at daycare Monday.  She's going to the same home where her big brother goes.  Two wonderful women are taking care of them.  The owner of the daycare is a mother herself and she's our neighbor.  We trust her.  But it's still torture.

The first day back at work is spent with thoughts mostly back at home.  Is she eating when she's supposed to?  Will they know how to rock her exactly right so she goes to sleep?  Do they remember that sometimes she won't calm down unless you walk around with her? 

Since Jude's arms are not fully developed I feel an extra level of concern about her daily activities.  Tummy Time is a common activity for babies to strengthen their neck and back muscles.  But most babies cry when they're put down for tummy time.  I'm always questioning myself, is she crying because she hates tummy time, like her brother did?  Or can she just not use her arms the way she needs to?  I wonder if she will develop her arm strength normally?  Does it hurt to have her arms in a certain position? 

It breaks my heart in a way to leave her. But sometimes you have to work.  Either you need the money or the balance of work and home.  You just have to know yourself and your family and don't let anyone try to tell you what's right for your kids.  If you're a happier person working, then your children will be happier.  And that's what matters.

 Jude goes back to Shriners in St. Louis in June.  Until then we won't know any new information about her condition.  Just what we learn on our own by watching and interacting with her.  When I'm not worrying about Jude or Joey, it's exciting to be back at work!  I get to sit next to my husband again.  I will see you at 4:30 and 6:00 on KSPR.